Funniest Thing Ever

Photo by Matt Murray, Taken September 2023

When I knew I was going to write about this, I wondered how I was going to stretch this story. I should have known not to get worried whether I could do it or not. I always come through and surprise myself. I like to put in a lot of details and that’s what worked for me again.

Let’s get on with it.

Everyone has restrooms (aka bathrooms) at their work place. Some restrooms are reserved for only the workers. Those are usually businesses that don’t serve the public.

I work at a place that serves the public. The bathrooms are accessible to both the employees and the public.

There’s a men’s restroom and a women’s restroom.

The men’s restroom consists of a sink, a urinal, and a sit-down toilet located in a stall with a door.

The women’s restroom consists of everything except the urinal. There are two sit-down toilets.

Now, let’s get more in-depth.

Men’s Restroom

As you enter the men’s restroom, there is a small silver trash can in the corner. You step on the foot pedal to open it. There’s an automated mechanism on the wall that turns the lights off when someone hasn’t been in there for a long time. Turn to the right and the sink will be off to your right. Look to the left and you’ll find the air blower to dry your hands. There is a mirror located on the wall above the sink. The sink is a square white porcelain model and it is attached to the wall. The handle on the left side is denoted with a red symbol to tell you that it is the hot water. The right handle is denoted by a blue symbol for the cold water. If you are looking at the mirror, on your right side is the soap dispenser. It is black. You place your hands under it and the soap will come out.

Next to that is a sign that reads “Employees Must Wash Hands”. I took the photo above the other day. That seems like a reasonable thing. It tells the employees that they must wash their hands.

In the sit-down toilet area (stall), there is a door that locks from the inside. The door is gray. There is a sink, a mirror, an air blower/dryer, a trash can, and a baby changing station. The area is so large you could have a party in there. The changing station is always in the down position but it can be put up and strapped onto the wall. It is as long as a person.

The toilet sits in the western corner. Off to the right and up is the toilet paper dispenser. It is black and holds four rolls of paper. The baby changing station is just beyond the toilet. Get up from the toilet and walk to your left and you’ll find the mirror, sink and air blower. You’ll also find the sign “Employees Must Wash Hands”.

Women’s Restroom

Walk into the women’s restroom and you’ll find the same kind of trash can in the corner. Turn to the left and you’ll see two stalls. One is on your left, while the other one is straight ahead. First you’ll pass the sink. It’s the same setup as the men's. It has the same sign.

The first stall on the left contains a toilet and the toilet paper dispenser on the wall to your right. There’s also a small trash can near the back of the toilet. And of course, there is a lockable door.

The second stall is larger, probably to accommodate handicapped individuals. It looks just like the men’s stall. I can’t remember if it has a changing table or not. It’s been awhile since I’ve been in there.

I know you’re probably wondering how I know all about the women’s restroom. Well, here goes. I have had to clean it a few times. What does this entail? Sweep and mop the floor. Pickup the garbage and replace the bags. Clean the sinks, toilets, and mirrors.

I had to get some toilet paper once too. It was during a busy time and I didn’t want any woman to walk in without me knowing it. So I placed a couple of wet floor signs in front of the door (to block it), so no one would enter until I got back. I hurried back to the stockroom to get the paper. As I came back, I saw that the signs had been moved. Luckily a man saw me coming and shouted out for his wife to wait. She had gone in. I told her that I’d just be a few seconds. I used the key to open the dispenser and put the paper roll in. I exited the restroom and removed the barricades (like they did any good). And she went back in.

Employees Must Wash Hands

Now back to what you’re here for. The sign in both of the men’s and women’s restrooms states that “Employees Must Wash Hands”. Like I said earlier, this is a simple instruction. The employees that visit the restroom must wash their hands.

Imagine my surprise one day when I was looking at the reviews on our Google Maps page. I noticed a guy that posted something unusual. It was so funny that I knew I had to write about it.

Here is what he said:

Waiting over 30 minutes in the bathroom waiting for an employee to come wash my hands. Maybe remove the “employees must wash hands” sign unless you want other innocent customers getting confused.

🤣🤣🤣 LOL!!! That is so hilarious.

Conclusion

Was he serious or just kidding? I think he was serious. Later, I perused his other reviews and he’s got a couple of other doozies. I’m beginning to think he might not be all there.

I hope you liked this one. It’s got to be the funniest thing I have ever seen.

Until next time, happy reading!

-Matt

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